The Tiny Voldemort Chronicles: 1

Sometimes I wonder if there's a purpose to Death Eating or if I'm just fuelling an unhealthy hobby.

The Trees

We discovered trees have sentience. They're total D-Bags

The Prince of Jins

Ernie doesn't give a shit about your problems.

The Whiteboard

Giving the whiteboard sentience was a mistake.

The Gnomes

Gnomes are sadistic fuckers

The Origin

Where dildos come from

The Reincarnation

Reincarnation was not going as planned

The Pig

To a pig, all lives are equally worthless.

The Potato

It's not just a potato. It's a potato that hates you

The Barracuda

Fun Fact: The Barracuda is the supermodel of the sea.

The Agenda

The Homosexual Agenda

The Wolfman

Caught in a moment of vulnerability, the Wolfman's true passion was expose: the violin

The Wizard

Most wizards aren't actually that old. They just smoke a shitton of meth.

The Llama

The emperor llama was very vain. His narcissism saved him often.